The Tape-r Caper

by Freya-Kendra

Rating: PG

Summary: Holiday Fic (Christmas) Jim returns home unexpectedly to find Blair in a pinch and on a roll.

Content: minor language minor sexual innuendo

The Tape-r Caper

The moment Jim Ellison opened the door of his truck, he instinctively honed in on his roommate's first urgent cries.

“God, Jim! Where are you?”

The desperation in Blair's voice spurred Jim into action. He jumped out of the truck, barely taking the time to slam the door behind him.

“Come on, Jim! I need you, man.”

Reaching the building, Jim took the stairs two at a time.

“Aahhhh!”

The sound of Sandburg screaming fell cold on Jim's soul. He drew his weapon, but knew he must use caution in approaching the loft.

“Jim! Dammit! I'm running out of time!”

His heart pounding, barely able to breathe, Jim paused at the loft door. He had to determine if Blair was alone. It was one of the most difficult things he had ever had to do, but he had to push aside Blair's pained cries; he had to ignore them to listen instead for signs of another presence -- another heartbeat, another voice, anything to indicate his partner was not alone. Even so, he could tell Blair's voice was fading.

“Jim,” Blair said softly. “Please come home.”

Hearing nothing else, just Sandburg, just the anxious pleas of his stricken partner, Jim forced open the door and lunged into the loft.

“Jim!” Blair cried out again, this time in excitement. “Thank god! I need help, here. I mean I *really* need your help!”

Confused to find Blair standing at the kitchen table with a roll of tape in his hands rather than tied to a chair with the tape wrapped around his wrists, Jim hesitated in the doorway.

“Come on, Jim! I lost the edge on this packing tape, and the post office closes in twenty minutes! I need you to use your sense of touch to find it for me!”

“You ... *what*?” Jim slowly shifted from fear to anger. “I thought you were dying in here!”

“I was, man! I *am*! Come on! If I don't get this in the mail today, there's no way it will arrive by Christmas!”

Holstering his weapon, Jim turned away, glancing into the empty hallway. “Dammit, Sandburg!” He said, spinning back to face his partner.” I really thought you were in trouble!”

“I am, Jim. You don't know how much in trouble I am! Cindy already has me on her shit list. That window is closing, man, tighter than a drum. If this doesn't arrive by Christmas....” He shook his head, his haggard expression melting into a forlorn, puppy-dog gaze.

Jim took a deep breath. What had Sandburg really done, after all? He could not have known Jim was out there. He could not have known that his frustrated cries sounded like something far more sinister that not being able to find the end on a roll of tape. Saying nothing, Jim moved to the table and held out his hand, wriggling his fingers as a cue for Blair to give him the roll. In an instant, he found the edge of the tape and picked at it with his fingernail until it began to unwind once more.

“Next time, bend a corner,” He said, tossing the roll back to his partner.

“Thank you, Jim!” Blair grabbed the tape and immediately went to work securing the package.” Thank you, thank you, thank you! Man, you don't know how much I appreciate this!”

“Yeah,” He replied with a tone of sarcasm. “I'll bet. But will *she*?”

“Oh, yeah!” Blair's smile could almost be classified as wicked.

“Shame on you, Sandburg!”

“What?” Blair was already at the door, package in one hand, keys in the other.

“It's Christmas, and all you can think about is this Cindy of yours showing you her appreciation!”

“No, that's not....” Sandburg paused. “Well, it wasn't....” He shook his head. “Christmas is about giving. I'm just excited to be giving her a gift I know she'll like.”

“Sure, Sandburg. And you'll be even more excited when she gives you a little something in return.”

“Jim; that's cold, man.”

“Not for a hot-shot like you.”

“That's....” Blair smiled half-heartedly.” That's funny, Jim. I, ah, I gotta go.”

“Nope.” Jim leaned against the kitchen table, his arms crossed casually in front of him.

“Ye-- What? What do you mean 'nope'?”

“You don't have to go. Not now.”

“What?” Realization began to dawn. “No!” Blair looked at his watch. The post office was already closed. “God, no! Jim! Why did you let me...? Why didn't you tell me...? Ahhgghhh! I don't believe this!” He shut the door behind him and leaned into it, banging his head against the wood to emphasize his defeat. “What am I going to do, now? It's hopeless!”

“Nope.”

“What?”

“It's not hopeless.”

“How...? But.... What are you talking about, Jim?”

“Twenty-four hour shipping.”

“What?” A spark of hope lit Sandburg's eyes. “Where?”

“McGee's. They're open twenty-four hours. Customer service also ships mail and packages.”

“Genius!” Blair shouted, opening the door again. “You are an absolute genius! Jim... Ah! Thank you!” He headed out into the hall.

“Sandburg?” Jim waited beside the table for his partner to return. A minute later, Blair was back, looking dejected all over again.

“The Volvo's in the shop.” He said softly.

“Yep.”

“Will you drive, Jim?”

“Yep.”

“Thank you, Jim.”

“And Blair?”

“What?”

“Merry Christmas.”

* * *